The Hand and Voice
\nAzmaria Dei Post
\n30 May 2011<\/p>\n
The depths of this pit falling before me
\nSucking me down into this despair
\nThis despair of darkness all alone
\nAlone with no hand to reach for
\nReaching towards a blue sky unseen
\nUnseen and nearly forgotten as I sink
\nSinking further into the depths deep
\nThe inky depths so long and dark
\nThe darkness so deep and crushing
\nCrushing my soul that yearns to be
\nTo be free and to fly with wings
\nWings now crushed and dying under
\nUnder the weight of the nightmare
\nThis nightmare that refuses to relent
\nA relentless assault of deprivation
\nDepriving me of light and my dreams
\nMy dreams now dark and empty
\nThe emptiness fills me and is heavy
\nHeavy like lead holding me down
\nDown into the depths of my soul
\nMy soul forgetting the good things
\nGood things forgotten and lost to me
\nI sink deeper wanting to reach for help
\nBut help is not there as I can’t reach
\nReaching for that help that I can’t see
\nSee as my limbs into despair are driven
\nDriving me down into hopelessness
\nHopelessly falling down this blackness<\/p>\n
But lo… What is this? A hand and a word?
\nA word that I can barely hear now so faint
\nFaintly calling to me and saying to me
\nAz, you are special. Please come back to us.
\nWe miss you and want to see you here.
\nHere I rest sedentary and crying motionless
\nMoving slowly I think about the voice and hand
\nDare I hope? Dare I reach for it? Dare I imagine?
\nImagine the light I once beheld and the skies
\nThe skies I once flew in with my dreams
\nMy dreams… so long have I dreamed…
\nDreams shattered and crushed I let go
\nAnd went into this pit of despair so deep
\nSo deep I could live without dreams uncrushed
\nUncrushed by the world that knows me not
\nNot because I lost faith in the world
\nBecause the world I live in has no place
\nNo place for one such as I as I am here
\nHere I am not me and am not allowed
\nNot allowed to reach for my dreams
\nMy dreams of being complete and whole
\nWholly myself and as I should be
\nBeing the goal of my childhood dreams
\nDreams so faint now, yet I remember
\nI remember them as they persist within me
\nMy heart starting to beat once more
\nMore life and hope yet again building
\nBuilding to fade again in this never ending cycle<\/p>\n
Az<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
The Hand and Voice Azmaria Dei Post 30 May 2011<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-129","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-depression","category-poetry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.split-world.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/129","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.split-world.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.split-world.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.split-world.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.split-world.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=129"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/blog.split-world.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/129\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":604,"href":"https:\/\/blog.split-world.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/129\/revisions\/604"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.split-world.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=129"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.split-world.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=129"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.split-world.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=129"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}